Captain's log March 2nd, 2020

Sometimes, I wonder if writing things down is worth it.

Take this log for example.  I started it years ago when I was on my teens, and I had friends doing the same. Most of them have cut ties with me,  and I don't they will be back to look at blog.

So who am I sitting here writing to?

I guess, to me.

And to you. 

I hope you know, dear reader, that you are important.  Your voice is special.  And people care about you. 

Don't ever give up.  

Rest if you need to.

We will set sail again tomorrow.

An Interesting Observation from the Old Testament

Today I was reading a number of different chapters in the book of Exodus, and I found something interesting. The priesthood of God was going to be given to the Israelites, but the only ones who showed themselves worthy of it were the children of Levi. They were given the Aaronic Priesthood.
Also interesting, is how Joshua, who had been away from the camp during the time of the Golden Calf, was not part of the idolatry, and therefore did not sin. Joshua is the man who was called to be the prophet after Moses was translated.

What can we learn from this?
I think that we can learn that it is important to choose God's side. If everyone around us is sinning, we should abstain, or better yet, leave so as not to be tempted to join. We should remember that our goal is to follow God, not golden idols, or idle pleasures. God is the source of joy and light. It makes perfect sense that our lives would be dark and depressing if we turn away from Him.

Thinking back

.I know someone that causes mixed emotions.

There is the urge to joke, and also to be serious.

The mouth wants to smile and laugh, but the eyes want to cry.

The mind is tired and wants to let go, but the heart beats faster and wants to hold on.

I want my heart back, but at the same time I don't.

Honestly people, I don't know what to do. :)

But this I do know, it is 3:19 in the morning.

I'm going to go to bed

Sometimes we feel like this.

Loneliness: The search for companionship

This is a paper I wrote for school on how we can find our significant other. I invite you all to read it.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1m0VvNf1F8RhkeFc7ecHG3K8mIbliup9LPa6hN8RQgtY/edit?usp=sharing

the urge

There is a feeling I frequently get when walking outside on a starry night. I felt this feeling many times as a missionary walking beneath heavens with the moon and stars shining down on me, and I have since felt it here, at home, though not as often. The feeling that if I were to let go and jump toward the clouds, I would fly. I would leave the earth behind and soar toward the distant lights that twinkle up above. Sometimes the urge to leap and test this feeling, to see if I would indeed whiz up into the air, is almost irrepressible. I don't know what would happen, if I were to give in and let go. But I know that if I were to fly, I would never come down. This is why I don't give in. I am not yet ready to remove the tether and soar to heaven. There are too many things I have to accomplish here on the ground.
In the meantime, don't be worried should you see me tearing down the street in a blur, or catch me leaping over furniture and bushes and rocks. I am only practicing for when the time comes to take off and make my climb to eternity.

trial o the heart

"Captain," boatswain Hans called as he came out of the trees onto the beach.  "Are ye about ready to set sail? The crew is beginning to wonder if we will ever leave this island."
Hans turned a corner and stopped in his tracks. There sat his captain on the prow of one of the ship's dingies.  He was slouched, with his head resting in his h ands and his eyes vacantly watching the waves. He appeared so lost and unlike the captain, that it took Hans by surprise.
"Eh Captain," the boatswain said, quietly,  "are you alright?"
The captain slowly turned toward Hans. "Have you ever found something that made you happy and sad at the same time Mr. Hans? He asked.  His soft, low voice carried easily on the ocean breeze
"The ship's Stores Do that some Captain," Hans said,  trying for a joke.  The captain didn't even crack a grin.
"I've found something that does this to me," the captain continued.
"What?" Hans asked.
Now the captain did grin, though the smile didn't reach his eyes. He looked up at his boatswain.
"A girl. The prettiest girl I've ever laid eyes on."
"Is that all sir? Just a pretty face?"
"Nay man, this lass be something special. She is pretty, yes, but there is so much more. There is a potential in her for greatness that she ain't tapped yet."
Hans mulled over his captain's words.
The captain meanwhile was lost again as he stared off across the beach.
"I take it then, Sir, that she be the reason we ain't shoved off yet?"
"Aye," was the captain's short reply.
"An you be a planning on staying here until when exactly?"
"I can't leave until I see her again."
"I'll go tell the men to relax then Captain. Being that we are going to be here awhile."
'Thank you Hans."
Hans left his captain then to his thoughts. The captain sighed heavily. It isn't an easy thing, to be patient....